I lost my money bag on Sunday somewhere between getting dropped off at the train station, changing trains twice n arriving at my final destination.
I lost money and my atm card so I have to wait for the bank to send me a replacement card in the mail.
It’s funny that I had a stingy attitude about sticking cash in the offering bucket and now I wish I had just given it so some tax payers hard earned greenbacks don’t inadvertently get wasted on prostitutes n drugs because of my bad stewardship of the resources God has given me.
My self confidence was completely shattered by this experience.
I was a stuttering spluttering bundle of nerves splattering teardrops all over the place n barely communicative with my parents ( n all the moms and pops in the building say what else is new ) 😁
It probably had something to do with the fact that I woke up at 3am so I could be ready to go at 6am so my friend wouldn’t be late for band practice with his worship team.
As it happened i was wasting my time cos he let his wife sleep in til 7am so we were late anyway.
The actual service didn’t start until 10am though.
I was so brainless I went with my friend to practice instead of staying in the car with his wife so we could grab some breakfast for all of us.
They both have such amazing stamina.
They can play instruments and sing for almost 2 hours standing up without so much as a coffee or morning burrito to keep them going.
I wanted to talk about the fact that when bad things happen to us God can use our experience cos it’s something others can potentially relate to.
It’s not good or helpful though to merely Dwell on the negative aspects of our circumstances.
We must try to focus on the lessons our mistakes can teach us so we don’t make them in future.
I was carrying a lot of things in my bag.
It wouldn’t have made a difference if I had one item or a 100 in my bag as long as I had room for my money bag.
I suspect i rested it on the seat next to me, an error in judgment i have also made at a bus stop with a book containing a sermon I wrote while drinking red wine near Murchison falls in Uganda n half finished preaching cos it started bucketing down with rain when I had barely scraped the surface of my in depth treatise on the connection between worship and sacrifice.
I think it also had something to do with Banning liebschers compelling words in his book grounded which so completely absorbed my attention that I was in my own little world completely disconnected from the world around me except every couple of minutes when the train ground to a halt and the conductor announced the station temporarily halting my deep immersion in transcendent spiritual truth.
I was certain i had left my money bag in my friends car but of course i was gravely flawed in my logic.
It’s a funny feeling to have a precious possession stripped away from you.
It causes you to consider what is truly important and significant in life.
I had a day in fiji where I was surrounded by people who may not get the same amount of money from the government as me but temporarily they were richer cos they had mobile phones and I had left mine in my friends car cos I was chatting to a pretty girl and I had my phone out next to me determined to get those digits buy i never managed to close the deal.
I think in this modern world we have a love hate relationship with technology.
We feel vulnerable when we are disconnected with the rest of the world yet in that moment however short or salvageable we are able to identify with that vast flock of people who are too poor to afford the expense of constantly having to recharge their mobile or yak on the net with their homies to their heart’s content.
What stops me drowning in misery, groaning and complaining is instead of thinking of what I no longer have i inject myself with a much needed joy shot by reminding myself of the miriad of items God has blessed me with and the numerous situations where He has gotten me out of some hairy jams which could have resulted in my death or possibly land me seriously hard time in jail.
I lost a photo of my friend and his mates who were breakfast deejays for a local radio station before they got replaced by 3 strangers i don’t know from a bar of soap.
I lost my free cake voucher for a little bit naughty coffee and cakes.
I was 3 coffees away from my freebie.
Lost my Fijian 50 dollar note
They are just under parity with Australia so I may as well have lost an ozzie 50.
The only reason I didn’t spend it over there is i forgot i had it cos it was zipped up in the compartment closest to my waist.
If i had worn it looped on my belt like it was designed to be carried i wouldn’t be moaning n groaning about this today.
I haven’t been getting a whole lot of sleep lately.
It’s related to the fact i was stupid enough to lose my girlfriend due to my own negligence.
I think it’s normal to have doubts about your relationship with someone.
I don’t think we’d be normal humans if we didn’t.
I think sometimes we feed our negative energy too much instead of our positive energy.
We don’t think that maybe in taking each other down a peg or 2 we are allowing ourselves to be pawns in the hand of the enemy.
As christians we should build each other up and not tear each other down.
There should be no such thing as just joking.
We should respect and honor each other .
Our freedom wasn’t purchased with the blood of our redeemer just so we could mock each other with our casual jibes and be flippant about holiness.
Despite my experiences evidence to the contrary i continue to convince myself that it’s possible for me to have a long distance relationship with someone and make it last forever and a day.
Cyberstalking is pinned on people so often that many do not consider its serious implications n likelihood to spill over into real life.
If people care about their privacy there are easy ways these days to block off unwanted attention.
Some people seem to crave drama.
They are not happy unless they have something to worry about.
They like to be the center of attention n forget to center their attention on Jesus the author and finisher of our faith.
Its not necessary for me to see all women as sisters only but once I declare my affections for one that’s a game changer.
The way i relate to the other ladies in my world should be automatically altered from here to eternity.
I blogged myself to sleep last night sometime between 10 pm and 6 am.
I find it interesting why some brown skinned people mock others a lighter or darker shade of brown than them.
We Europeans mock each other for being too pale .
Spending an excessive amount of time in the sun is necessary to achieve the desired ideal of a perfectly bronzed body that suffers from an excess of cancerous lumps, freckles n benign moles.
In the 1800s being pale and chubby as an igloo was held up as the ideal.
I feel like last night i betrayed who i am as a person by participating in a game that required participants to insult each other.
I should have read my book about Jesus instead of joining in with the crowd.
We all feel we should be more interactive in person with each other yet we still spend an excessive amount of time sitting round in circles staring at our phones cos we don’t know how to break out of our zombie like habit.
My friend pulled my arm in the air then left it there before we were done reciting an oath.
I felt like the proverbial elephant still mentally imprisoned though the chain had long been removed from my leg.
I never agreed not to disclose what occurred last night in a suburban garage in a deception bay townhouse.
I didn’t even mouth the words to make it look like i was playing along.
I suppose in hindsight i could have tried harder to resist my friends action of pulling my arm upwards.
I don’t want to be one of those people who insult people just for fun.
I know words cause pain even spoken in jest.
I don’t believe it’s right to mock others for their lack of material possessions, their weight, race, mental intelligence or any other reason.
Although I admire my friends creativity and smile despite myself i still feel like there’s something ugly and evil about getting delight from criticizing others even in a supposedly humorous way.
It’s human nature to like to see enemies or villains suffer but Jesus tells us to love our enemies and do good to those who despitefully use us.
We can use people in a non spiteful way when we enlist their help to do good or morally neutral activities like cleaning our room which is made virtuous by obeying our parents for those of us still living at home and being a good steward of the resources God has given us ( which relates to all of us ).
Is it a good enough reason to want to go to a country just because your previous plans to visit it fell through because your bad behavior stopped you from fulfilling what may have possibly been God’s purpose to go with that bunch of missionaries and teach English to people in the middle east while walking around praying for those yet to start laying down their lives before the feet of Jesus.
Something holds me back from going to her and digging deeper into the complex framework that makes up all that she is.
Something prevents me from exploring her mental chambers in this room full of people when our chairs are spaced within yelling distance but not close enough to get comfortable and have a conversation more intimate than the fluctuating price of eggs in China.
Her life is fascinating as is mine yet we always float just above the surface with each other.
She sees the need for christians to talk in a way that’s relatable to people of the world.
Sometimes we talk in code discussing commonly being born again, tithes, offerings, mission trips, communion, baptism and covenants.
We take it for granted that those outside Christ’s beloved already know what these terms mean but why should we assume that when a church can offer a foundations course on Christianity and graduate students from a college that doesn’t even compel a pastor to read the bible from cover to cover.
We never dig deeper into what the Bible means so is it any wonder our souls are starving.
I either follow you cos you deepen my relationship with Jesus or you help me better comprehend those who don’t have one.
I am always pleasently surprised by how much positive cross pollination there is between those two polar opposite extremes in this loving blog community.
God is our refuge and strength an ever present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear though the earth be removed and all the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea.
I went through an exhausting back and forthing in my mind as to whether i should completely cut a certain woman out of my life.
I lied to my friend that I would get rid of her.
I hate myself for that but I can’t live without her even though I probably don’t mean anything to her as she has more admirers than beyonce has fans or outfit changes in one concert.
I try not to waste time going for chicks that are already taken.
I don’t want to be that guy who steals a woman away from the love of her life cos I never want to be in the shoes of the guy who gets his beloved ripped from his fingers.
I can explain physically why im addicted to her but not why I choose to remain involved or connected with her when I feel like everything she says that reeks of hells influence is destroying my soul by associating with her.
It’s the little glimpses of godliness n deepness in her life that keep me hanging on in the hope that she can change.
I love her just the way she is but i love her too much to leave her messed up.
I want to try my level best to help her become a different person.
This from a guy who slept in his clothes last night who crashed on top of his sheets with the lights on.
I guess all i really need to figure out is who is meant to be a wife and who is meant to be a friend and nothing else besides.
God didn’t design any human to be my enemy.
I only block people who promote pornography or false religions on my site or if they insult my faith.
I wouldn’t stop someone from being my friend if they cuss or believe differently on their own site.
Sometimes the hardest battle is getting everyone to the table to admit we all believe in something without necessarily agreeing that we all believe in the same thing.
We are living in a dangerous world where what you say online can potentially get you in trouble offline but that is a necessary battle we must be prepared to face if we truly believe in Jesus and or are willing to die for our convictions.
Jesus said no one takes my life i give it up willingly
How committed are we to our dreams and passions n the causes we believe in
Unless we are prepared to resist evil to the point where our own blood is spilled we can only call ourselves fans of Jesus not true followers
How dare anyone suggest those who sacrifice their lives for Jesus are not true believers
I do not need to call out names
Then I become like those who falsely perceive me as their enemy instead of a fellow jesuit (friend of Jesus ).
I can’t be a friend of Jesus if I do or condone what offends the sight of Jesus.
Sin is a pungent stench to God’s nostrils like an ever expanding mansion of dirty diapers ( my friends lives now til they reach toddlerville) .
He doesn’t want lukewarm living fence sitters or backwash flavored milkshakes.
He wants His fragrant incense smelling beautiful blood purified bride who is done with her whoring ways and remaining faithful til Christ our groom returns.
Some of my young primary school aged friends get the need to only listen to holy music that reflects God’s heart to guide our own from the influence of the wicked one.
Sometimes I want to influence for God’s kingdom but it’s more like i was being influenced by the enemy.
There is no logical reason why I come under great spiritual attack as soon as I physically remove myself from the protective covering of my church.
Under His wings we find refuge.
We don’t have to be under a church roof to find ourselves under His wings but it may help to build our faith.
My faith can flourish in isolation when I go into hibernation from the depravity of the world but I know there are limits to my capacity to endure without forcing myself to be aware of the existence of other arms and legs in the body of Christ.
In helping them i am loving Him.
At least one other believer or person deciding to focus on God for any period of time is required for us to have church.
God requires us to keep a whole day holy.
If you see yourself as His sanctuary you will be less likely to want to pollute it.
Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit but sometimes we allow other spirits to influence us and convince us that we will always stay down and defeated.
The more I Dwell on my need for change the less likely my change will occur.
The more I focus on Jesus the more the influence of the world loses its grip on my life.
I can feel an overwhelming peace and trickles of joy begin to flood my soul.
This is indeed an amazing crazy miraculous mystery.
The power of God to transform a life.
Though we are redeemed by the blood of the lamb we must be in a state of constant readiness.
We can be resting in Christ’s love and still be in battle mode.
We can never hope to win the war for human souls if we do not recognize our sword drips with Christ’s blood oozing out our lives and infusing us with love.
The word of God became flesh and dwelt among us.
Learn to recognize and separate the voice of God from the voice of the enemy.
They are never one and the same.
Reading God’s word gives us discernment.
Logos will never contradict rhema and vice versa.
We mustn’t be so obsessed with our own greatness that we forget any wisdom we have comes from a divine source.
Otherwise like nebuchadnezzar we may be forced to eat grass and live like an animal til we learn the humbling lesson of how little we are and how awesome and mighty our God truly is.